November 2006

Marc Hogan.
STEALTH Influence & Sales Mastery
STEALTH:
The act or action of proceeding imperceptibly.
INFLUENCE: To affect or change how someone or something develops, behaves or thinks.
MASTERY: Possession of consummate skill.

After an horrendous journey through traffic, which meant he missed his tea, but arrived in time for the evening, Marc began by orienting us in the world of ‘persuasion’, subjected as we are to approx 800 adverts per day.  Influence is all about us, much of it at an imperceptible level. Pressure to ‘deliver’ often causes people (obviously not us) to push their solution regardless of the needs of their customer. Our customers can be anyone, in any situation where we want to persuade, or influence behaviour and decisions. At work, at home, in the boardroom or in the bedroom!
Interestingly (for me) the evening was all about ‘sensory acuity’, and ‘pace, pace, lead’.

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   Alan?

To illustrate how much information is available to us in an interaction Marc asked for a volunteer. Alan, a visitor from afar, drawn to the group by the presence of Marc, joined him at the front, and maybe regretted it later!
Marc asked the rest of us to shout out what we could deduce just by looking at Alan. Some ‘things’ would be true and factual, other ‘things’ might be true or possible. On the true side we could say he was wearing shoes, a shirt, trousers. We could assess his height at about six foot, and by his presence here  it was highly likely he was interested in NLP & / or sales. (Unless he was one of the bowlers who had wandered upstairs by mistake).
On the possible side came underwear and socks!
We reckoned he worked indoors, drove a ‘family’ size saloon,(though not a Mondeo), was a non smoker, took regular exercise and most of us thought his preferred rep system was kinesthetic! Though some thought he was ‘visual’.

Is the group clairvoyant? Do we read minds? Was this a set up?
Possibly! All the time! No!
The point of this ‘game’ was to demonstrate how much information is presented by others to us, by us to others, without any conscious involvement. What we have to remember, if influence is our game, is to look for what is already obvious, what is already there on display.

   Is there
   anybody
there?

Taking this principle further, Marc asked Kate to join him at the front and asked her some simple questions about people in her life.
“Kate I want you to think about someone you really like.” (Notice where Kate directs her gaze and attention. If not sure amplify by asking her to think about the last time they met and how good that was.)
“Kate, I want you to think about someone or something you don’t like, even hate.”( Notice where Kate ‘looks’ now.)
So if you want Kate to agree to a proposal of some sort where should you put yourself in relation to her? On the side she looks for people she likes or on the side she looks for people she hates?
If you are seeking to sell your services or goods ask about the last really satisfying purchase Kate made. And the last purchase that was a mistake. Now you know where to present your product or service to have it considered in a positive way, by Kate.

Now if you’re with me so far, you will have already realised this is not rocket science, and is probably something you already do without knowing you are doing it.
Now with NLP you can know when you are doing it and do it better all the time!!
Not only place yourself where you stand the best chance of influencing also use ‘their’ words. The words they use when they talk about someone they like, use about yourself, the words they use about someone they don’t like use about your competition.
HOW MANIPULATIVE!! HOW UNETHICAL!!
How stupid to do anything else! How many conversations do you want to have with people, where you come away without any agreement, with a sense they don’t like you, knowing they will never ‘buy’ anything from you. How does that help anyone?

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Marc shared a story about meeting his wife, who at the time was in a relationship with someone else. As the evening progressed and Marc realised just how much he fancied this lady, he was able to put his case for going out with him, using just these simple methods. Was this unethical or just the use of subtle means of communication that allow us all to communicate better and in line with our values and beliefs. Just remember how difficult it is for humans to tell lies. How our body language gives us away if we are not congruent with our message. Remember (Guys) women are much better at picking up these dissonances than we are. If you were planning to use this technique to get your leg over it will probably work, especially if she fancies you too! If you profess  undying commitment it  won’t be convincing unless you really mean it!
Marc has come clean & told his wife about his ‘sales’ approach. She has fully committed by marrying him. (Serves him right!)

About now we took the break.

Taking a step back Marc reminded us that the ‘sales’ process has several stages, The first and most important of these is the information gathering stage.
In ‘chatting up’ his now wife he asked her “what she looked for in a perfect partner”. How could he ‘sell her’ on his qualities without some frame of reference which had meaning for her? Doubtless over time the less ‘perfect’ qualities will also surface, but hey ho its good to have ‘stuff’ to work on!
Time for more games. We like games. (Did I mention this is a PRACTICE group?) Working in pairs, threes and even fours, (there were a lot of us there) we helped our ‘friends’ think about something they really, really liked and with our hands identified it in space in front of them. (Spatial anchor). We asked them to ‘ramp up the submodalities’ (make it bigger, brighter etc) and then moved it in closer for them to experience the joy and ecstasy all over again. Then we did the same for ‘something they didn’t like / found repulsive and noticed how much they moved away as we brought it nearer. As Marc pointed out in his demonstration of this there is actually nothing there! We all made it up in turn. But it was jolly real when it was my stuff someone was moving about.
This can be applied to the sales process. Anchor positive requirements in one place and negatives in another.  Firing the positive anchor every time you mention your own product or service. Can also be used in job interviews, presentations, speeches and any other situation, where you want to communcate the positive attributes of yourself or something important to you.

BuiltWithNOF
hearts

Summarising for us, Marc reminded us that ‘people buy from people they like’. Liking is the first and most important part of the process. Help your customer to like you, yes even you! Create a relationship based on respecting their point of view. Listen to their needs, ask questions about their ‘best’ decisions, anchor their responses. Stack your product benefits on their ‘good’ side, and be prepared to deliver what you promise or they won’t like you next time!

Thank you Marc for showing us and helping us feel for ourselves the power and magic of imperceptible influence. I hope you managed to eat some of the food I got for your tea on the way home!
For more on Marc and Persuasion skills visit his website.
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